What prompts this update to my blog you say? It starts by several recent occurences, of which, none suprised me. The weekend of February 6th and 7th was Troy’s weekend with Cassidy. Troy and his girlfriend Mary both know that if they want to make arrangements for us to courteously drive to the half-way point to assist in making sure Cassidy gets to see Dad, that several things need to happen.
1) a phone call by end of day Wednesday to make travel arrangements to meet half way.
2) Bring $300/month child support (150 every two weeks, assuming he’s actually seeing his daughter, note that the legal amount owed is $550/month).
So, the first message we received that week was on Friday at 2:45pm on our home answering machine (they have my cell phone number). As Troy is a child, he doesn’t want to abide by the rules, nor respect those that would make them. So, having no time to plan to work around Troy’s lack of maturity, we we unable to arrange a meeting to have Cassidy see her Dad.
Upon the end of the weekend and our return home, I called Mary;s Cell phone (the only point of home contact we have for Troy) on Monday, and told her we would be happy to make plans for the following Weekend. She spoke about the upcoming weekend, and a car show that they WOULD be attending, and that they were not sure that would work. Mary called me back informing me that the only way it would work is if we met on Thursday. Wanting Cassidy to have her Dad in her life, we made arrangements with Cassidy’s Kindgergarten teacher to have her day work for Friday sent home with her on Thursday (thinking she could do the work over the weekend with Dad and Mary). So, I called back on Wednesday getting Mary’s cellular phone Voicemail, saying “Yes, we can meet on Thursday, please call me back to confirm, agreeing to 1)get the school work done before her return to San Jose and 2)bring $300 which was now due.
Thursday and Friday came and went, with no returned phone call, and Cassidy longing to see her Dad, not understanding why Dad didn’t call, not knowing that Dad didn’t call. We try as we can to protect her from the stuff that will make her suffer that she doesn’t need to feel.
So, the following Thursday night at 9:30pm (almost two weeks from the original weekend Troy was supposed to meet us and take Cassidy, and well after Cassidy was asleep, Dad has no time to talk to his daughter) he calls. Saying, lets set it up so I can see my daughter. I ask him if he has the child support (which, even the lower amount would be $300). He only has $150, and says thats all he can get. So, I kindly tell him, he’ll need to bring $300, and he’ll need to borrow the money if he doesn’t have $300. We go back and forth a bit, but he seems to start to see some of the reason in my thinking.
His points are like this:
-I missed seeing my daughter because of you
(uh, Troy, no…., that is not correct, you’re irresponsible, that’s why)
-Since i’ve been screwed outta that last weekend, I don’t owe you as much Child Support
(uh…Troy, no…. that is not correct, nor does the law agree with you)
-I’ll bring $150 this time, and we can make up the missed weekend the following weekend, and go back on schedule the weekend after that (uh, no Troy, we have plans for the weekend she’s going to be up here, Anna’s Mom is going to come up, and No, I’m not driving down toward Bakersfield three weekends in a row, only so you can weasil your way out of further child support)
So, when he saw I was not flexible on this, he said “So that’s it eh? You’re going to keep me from seeing my daughter?”, to which I responded “No, incorrect, you can come up and pick Cassidy up and drop her back off, just make arrangements to do so” (since you won’t pay child support). We have never kept her from seeing him once, he’s just a lazy child, and he will either grow up or suffer. It’s his choice. We’ve been checking up with the California Department of Child Services, and they’re going to start garnishing his wages here in a bit, which will be nice, we won’t have to deal with Troy about Child support anymore.
Troy thinks I’m rolling in the dough, he has no idea of the monthly bills I have, and like a child, doesn’t think that there may be more than meets the eye. I’m sick of his bullshit, and I’m very close to making transporting Cassidy to and from San Jose his sould responsibility.
Around Christmas time, he physically threatened me on the phone. The result of that is what you read in this post, and an ineligibility to ever set foot in or around our home. I suspect Troy will never grow up, and as such, Cassidy will suffer some emotional and mental anguish. While I’m not Cassidy’s Dad, I try to make up for his childish behavior.
I love Cassidy and I Love Anna, and my actions show that. Troy spent his child support at the car show, that is where his priorities lie. Good job Dad.